Stress, worries, concerns. Over the past few years I gained a perspective that has helped me a lot to at least reduce the bad effect of these common outcomes. I say “outcomes” because the topic of today needs clarification in terms of a cause and consequence analysis.
This has helped me personally and professionally, to be honest, I haven’t seen a single issue pop up where this concept is not applicable. In fact, it provides huge clarity in terms of how you should proceed (pretty much from a life perspective). And, as a consequence, reduces stress, helps with worries and concerns.
So, here it is: Means and Ends, Cause and Consequence. I always had this topic as more of an insight and observation from before, after actually hearing from our CEO that there are courses on this, heavily applied in management consulting to help companies achieve better results.
Check out the very first meditation from “The Daily Stoic” (January 1st – Control and Choice):
“The chief task in life is simply this: to identify and separate matters so that I can say clearly to myself which are externals not under my control, and which have to do with the choices I actually control…”
And we’ve all heard before the following prayer:
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; Courage to change the things I can; And the wisdom to know the difference”
Don’t worry, I’m not digging into religion here, but pay attention to the concept and ask yourself: Do you stress over things you cannot change? Do you take care of the stuff you actually have control over? Are you aware of the difference?
Here’s what I suggest:
- For the Means (Cause): Pay attention, take care of it, focus on it;
- For the Ends (Result, Consequence): Let it go!
An example (I can write a hundred articles on this topic), as simple as it comes, take some new year’s resolution that people have:
An example (I can write a hundred articles on this topic), as simple as it comes, take some new year’s resolution that people have:
- Here’s what I’ve seen work: “Next year I will exercise more”;
- Here’s what I’ve never seen work: “Next year I want to lose weight”.
Now, you can argue all you want, but this is where I am going with this: at the first one, the person is actually saying something that they can control, it is a mean, indeed, he/she can actually exercise more.
The second one, the person has no control, because it is an outcome/end, it cannot be guaranteed. What are the things he/she will actually do to make sure the results are achieved? Eat less? Exercise more?
Similarly, when mentioning other life/personal examples, professional examples, it is the same. This is the takeaway I want you to have:
Be aware of what is a mean and what is an end. People that take good care and focus on the means achieve great results, people that stress over results and don’t understand the means, only make things worse (stress, worries and concerns).
If there is something you want to achieve (Ends), what can you do about it (Means)? Do you know the difference?
So, for your poker career, you want to make more money (Ends) right? Are you fully aware of everything you can do (Means) to make sure that happens?
It sounds obvious, but if so, how come people have such a hard time achieving better results?
Reach out, let me help, I’ve been in your position.
Rene Kuhlman - TheWakko